Can't Believe It's Coming to an End

I still don't understand why Teresa's still onto me. After classes ended in the afternoon, I went to the bus stop and saw her there waiting for the bus. I kept my distance away from her until the bus came. Not knowing that she takes the same bus (if I did, I would have stayed behind), I walked past her towards it. When she called me, I didn't respond. Then, she called me once more and tapped on my shoulder to get my attention. That small gesture made me pissed immediately. (Mind you, she doesn't like anybody touching her, not even a small tap, and yet she touched me. How ironic!) I turned my head, and said F-off (Don't misunderstand, I didn't say the word, just the letter 'F'). While I took the transfer, she asked, "Why are you doing this to me?" Calmly, I answered, "Hmm, I wonder." To that, she said, "Why are you doing this to me? I don't deserve this." With an unfriendly smile, I simply asked, "Really?" and sat on the seat near the exit (at least a meter away from her), my back towards her. "I already said I'm sorry, so I don't owe you anything" is all she said, though she did sound a bit pissed (at me maybe?).

So, Teresa's saying that by simply apologizing, I should let go of that insult she gave me? Come on, she can't be serious! That insult ripped my dignity and she thinks she doesn't owe me anything? Even if hers' is removed, it won't erase my loss, nor would I feel any better. After a simple argument (refer to "The Events So Far" entry), she's still not willing to talk to friend A. If she can't let go of something that small, why does she expect me to forget the insult? Honestly, the argument is nothing compared to the insult, and don't forget about the countless "mean" jokes she's said to me (refer to "Should I? Or Should I Not? entry). If I didn't have a nosebleed half an hour earlier, I would have lost my temper right there and then. Luckily for her, I kept myself as calm as possible to prevent any further bleeds. Besides, there's no need to become upset and ruin my day.

Anyways, enough about Teresa. I can't believe that my first year at college is actually coming to an end. It's closer than you think (at least for my classmates and myself) because I have a Chemistry lab exam tomorrow afternoon. I remember talking to a friend about my worries for college during the summer holiday. I was afraid I wouldn't survive the first month and was extremely anxious about the tests and assignments that would be given in my class. I remember her telling me that I'll do fine and that my worries are a waste. She also added that I'll look back wondering why I was so worried. Well, she is half right. I did do pretty nicely in my classes, but there are lots of rooms for improvement. However, I'm not too confident about the coming exams nor am I for the following 2-3 years. Hopefully she's right. What I'm also worried is whether I'll be able to find a job when I graduate. Looking at the economic crisis we're experiencing, there's no way I cannot worry about the future. Besides, I'm still jobless.

No one can control what the future unfolds, nor can they foretell the events that are waiting to happen. I suppose we just have to wait and see with strong hopes in our hearts.