Lunch, My Treat!

It's been about a month and a half since I started working! Awesome huh? For the first time, I finally did something that I really wanted to since my first paycheck! What is it? It's treating my mom to a meal!! And today, I finally did it!!

When I got off work at three, mom picked me up (to save bus fares). Since we were both a little hungry (I didn't eat anything since last night), we went to Market Village (beside Pacific Mall) for lunch. After we finished ordering, I quickly told mom that I wanted to treat her. As I paid for the order, mom must have been smiling during the whole time because the lady behind the counter exclaimed, "Look at the huge smile on your mother's face!" Mom was still smiling as she said, "Yup! She just started working and is treating me for the first time!"

The meal didn't really cost much, but I certainly noticed how much she enjoyed it. The whole process felt so good! I finally did something that made her happy! It was a small and simple gesture, but I'm sure it's the thought that made her so happy. Seeing her wearing such a huge smile filled me with something that I can't fully describe..was it happiness? pride? or a mixture of both? I can't tell - but whichever it was, it's definately one of the greatest moments of my life!

My Preferable Lifestyle!

A customer came in yesterday and we had a nice conversation. The conversation started off with him asking whether I'm still going to school and which college I'm in. He also said something that drew my attention. He told me to enjoy my school life while I still can because in the end I might miss it. He said he missed it a lot, especially the fun times while hanging out with his friends. Though I do have to say, he must have graduated a long while ago (he had a "businessman" look) and may have lost contact with most of his friends.

The truth is, will I really miss the school days? For now, I really don't think so. My lifestyle for the past few weeks involves only work, which is quite similar to the lifestyle I may have (if I'm lucky) after I graduate (the only difference will be my occupation I guess) and I'm enjoying it! When I get home from work, I feel so relaxed and comfy. There's no need for me to worry about school or anything related (perhaps I'm just lazy). The days just pass by quite swiftly and of course, the idea that I'm making money by myself feels great!

I actually have my future all planned out and it's quite simple. After I graduate, I'll have a full-time job that's related to my program. Then I'm going to (hopefully) save enough money and buy a duplex or a two/three bedroom suite. During my free-time, I plan to read books, listen to music, go out with friends, enjoy a coffee at a café or bake a cake at home. Simple enough, right? This lifestyle I want is (definately) not easy to accomplish, but it's surely going to be a strong motivation to work harder and put more effort in everything I do.

Will I succeed? Hopefully I will, nothing is impossible right?

Wish me luck!!

The Truth About Retail

Wow!! It's been two weeks since my last entry! I suppose I've been quite busy lately. Despite the exhaustion, I feel great - especially when I make a small contribution to the household by giving my mom $100 after each payroll! I guess the pride gave me a confidence boost!

I was working on Friday night (until closing) with a co-worker who worked at the store since last year Christmas. He wasn't happy with the job, especially with the (minimum) wage. He also mentioned something that I didn't really give much thought into until this morning. He said that retail stores are able give their employees such a low income is because of the simplicity of the job itself. Anyone can work in retail and learning how to do the job doesn't take much time, and he's right!

As someone who has no employment experiences whatsoever, my choices are quite limited and retail does seem like the only thing I'm capable of. To be honest, I am very grateful that I'm able to find a job during the current economy. No matter how bad the job really is, you are making money from that job - which is good enough for me.

I do plan to continue working at the store for the next two/three years. Let's just hope I'll be able to accomplish that!

Wish me luck!!

An Escape from My Past

Last night, I was on the phone with a friend. From her, I found out that she got accepted to Ryerson University! I'm so happy for her and hopefully she does well there!!

During our half-hour conversation, I mentioned about my eagerness to move to a new home (with mom of course) and away from Malvern at the very least. It's not only from the stuff that happens in this neighbourhood (that sort of stuff can happen practically anywhere), or the fact that our suite is too small for us to live in. I just want to escape to a neighbourhood where the people living there don't know who I am and better yet, have no idea of my past. Here in Malvern I'm pretty well-known, but in a negative way. Most of those who know me (minus my friends) only think of me as the girl who's (rumoured to) like so-and-so, who's completely mental, or this and that... and to tell the truth, I'm sick of it.

Those kinds of titles block people from knowing me as a person and who I am today. Yes, I admit it. I have done all sorts of crazy things, but that doesn't mean I won't change and become a different person. People around me have no idea how much it hurts to be known as something that came directly from one's past or how much it hurts when I hear the familiar phrase, "Oh! Isn't that the girl who..." or "Isn't she..." I didn't want it to be that way. It just so happens that the events turned me to that direction. It's not like I wanted to be different and stand out above the crowd. I don't care about being noticed - I never have and never will!

Perhaps that's the reason why I'm so relieved (and happy) that I'm now studying in an environment where no one will look at me under that light and will only know me as who I am today.

I know that moving will not solve anything, but for me, it seems like the only solution. It's not like I could change people's thoughts about me, and even if I could, I don't have the patience to wait for that day to come. However, that doesn't mean I'll be able to move anytime soon. Finding a new home is a long process, especially when you're trying to find the right one. I suppose I'll just have to wait patiently and see how things will unfold for me in the future...

One thing's for sure: the bonds between myself and my friends will not break despite the distance. Perhaps they will become stronger...who knows?